don't even go there

Don't even talk to me right now. I'm having a moment.

my gramma is better than your gramma

Ok, so i am biased. I can't help it.

Grandma's been in Maryland the last week or so staying with her two daughters down there. Her alzheimer's has taken been a challenge for everyone and so to give Grandpa (and the rest of us) a much needed break, she went to visit family down there.

Luckily though her two great-grandchildren live there and so her days were filled with fun an exciting activities with the girls.

On Saturday, Grandpa and I headed down there for the weekend to pick up Grandma. I was grateful for the time i go to spend with everyone, eventhough I will see them all again in 2 weeks and 4 days. (YES its that close!)

I love watching grandma play with her great-grandchildren because it reminds me of my childhood with her. I was blessed to live so close to her, and so we spent lots of time together hiking in the woods, baking bread etc. So watching her snuggle with my cousin's little girls made my heart melt and i couldnt help but snap a few dozen shots with my camera. Watching their interactions is priceless.






On a less happier note, I'm not pregnant. But the good news is my cycle is regular! Maybe next month!

Down to the Wire

It's now 3 weeks and 5 days until the wedding. Last minute stuff is well underway like tragic meltdowns over tedious details and crazy facial breakouts. You can actually play dot-to-dot on my face. It's awful!

We are frantically tying bows on favors and going for last minute tweaks on the wedding dress alterations. The shower was two weekends ago and it was quite a nice party. Rob and I got lots of lovely things.

Over the last few weeks we have been approached by many people asking ... "are you excited".... "are you nervous"... "is everything done?"


Yes.... No.... pretty much...

Everything pretty much IS done. And I'm not nervous about getting married, though sometimes it baffles me that I actually found someone so fast. Overall, I think Rob and I have proven worthy of each other over the last year and half. We made it through some rough spots, spats and spits and still we find that the world is a better place when we're together.

Isn't that all that counts?

Truthfully though, I can't wait for regular life to resume at our house!

Fear

Have you ever been afraid of heights? If so, then you know EXACTLY what i am talking about when i say "I hate the upper level of Shea Stadium".

Last night we went to see the Mets Play the Nationals at Shea. My girlfriend Christy had some extra tickets so she invited us and naive me accepted with pleasure..... without asking WHERE those seats were located. I had heard about that guy who fell off the escalators the other day and died. Craziness. I suppose my senses were extra heightened but i was NOT prepared for this....

We're all packed in the car (Rob, me and Luke in his car seat) all squished in the back and Brian starts talking about how high up the seats are. AGAIN I didnt give it any thought. If i can sit back row at the Nassau Colliseum, I can do anything!

I lied.

We started climbing stairs in the upper level for what seemed like FOREVER and i had such a panic inside me I couldnt even look back down. I just concentrated on the stairs in front of me and finding my seat as soon as humanly possible (without falling of course).

When we got near our row, suddenly the crowd in front of me stopped... on the stairs...

A plane roared over the stadium and my instincts of course were to look UP...BIG MISTAKE. PANIC. Oh MY GOD!I immediately diverted my eyes back down to the cement slab steps in front of me. I couldn't look up. All i could do was tug on Rob's shirt and ask..."what the heck is the hold up?".

FINALLY... the row started moving again. I grabbed the backs of the chairs in my row as I slowly made my way down the aisle, until ....What??? I have to walk PAST someone to get to my seat??? OMG. Luckily he was a friend of the group I was with because i grabbed his hand to shake him and I practically hugged the bastard. I quietly appologized.

My seat was calling out to me... "SIT DOWN YOU SILL GIRL". My butt was planted and I still hadn't looked down. My whole body was twisted to face everyone behind me.

Rob leaned over to me..."you ok?"

"um I will be..i think".

"I guess we're not coming to another Mets game with them, huh? (Christy and Brian bought a 15 pack with a whole bunch of people from his family).

"i dont think so". I said it calmly, but inside i was still FREAKING OUT!

"Are you going to be ok if you have to pee?"

"I'm only going down those stairs ONCE tonight...and when i do, I am NOT coming back up. I'll be fine. I just went to the bathroom before we came up here, thank god!".

By then, I had attracted attention to myself. Christy leans over...

"you ok?"

"I'm fine" I said with a fake smile on my face.

She knew. I have had height issues before and she's been my best friend for almost 20 years.

"Guess you wont be coming back here with us again, huh?".

She read my mind. "NOPE".

I did manage to turn around and watch the game. BUT i had to concentrate on the game or have a conversation with someone behind me. I freaked out when people were standing around me or climbing up or down over the chairs (the upper section was not full at all).

Rob was a saint and spent 45 minutes on line getting us some supplies. He missed nearly 3 innings. I just dont get why they have different lines for everything. One for beer (that i get), one for ice cream, one for chips and such... By the time you get through all the lines... jeeze.

It was also friggin' COLD! Luckily I brought a big fleece blanket. My mama didnt raise no fool! When that sun went down, the breeze picked right up and out came the blanket!

The game actually was good. We left during the middle of the 9th inning. It was about 10:00pm or so and we had a 3 year old with us who needed to get to bed.

Going down the stairs wasnt QUITE as bad as I thought. Rob walked in front of me and held my hand on his shoulder.

"I'll go slow" he said to me.

My God i love that man.

First Swim of the Season

Remember that truly magnificent day we had last week?

Well, my boys both agreed it was time for the first swim of the season.... so off we went to the beach. As you can see they truly enjoyed themselves. The salt water does wonders for Copper's coat.

Grandma visits her Grandaughter

I took Grandma to Connecticut yesterday to visit one of her grandaughter's (my cousin) Karen. We had a really nice day. It was challenging at times for Karen and me because Grandma repeated herself throughout the day. She also forgot where she was and who Karen was atleast once during the day, but Karen handled it well.

Rumors

I know. You're wondering! Hmmm... Is she? Well...

Apparently the baby bug has been biting an awful lot of people lately. Here's the list:

1. My friend Christy - Christy has been my friend for almost 20 years now. She has a 3 year old boy Luke who I frequently write about. She is expecting #2 (a girl) in July. She'll be 7 months pregnant at my wedding LOL.

2. My cousin Melissa - this is #3 for her, and if she's really luckly, it will be #3 girl! LOL.

3. My cousin Kris - His wife Rachel is a few weeks along now and although Kris is nervous, he's also excited.

3. I also just heard my ex-husband's wife is pregnant.


Does anyone else want to add themselves to my list? There must be something in the air...

Now i know you are all wondering.... Am i pregnant?

Well....

NO. I'm not. But i want to be. And in fact Rob and I have been "practicing" for a few months now with absolutely no success. I have some issues with my ovaries that weren't really an issue until I decided to go off my birth control.

I know it may seem so immoral doing it "before" the wedding but in our hearts, we are already married. We pledged our life together the day he proposed and I accepted. Don't you wish it were that simple with every life-changing event? I do!

With that said, I visited with my doctor and he has made some good recommendations, including taking a medicine called Clomid. We'll see what happens. It may not happen at all, but i feel like we have to give it a try before moving on to other options.

Spring

I havent really been posting pictures in my photography blog for a while now, so I thought i would incorporate it more into this blog.

Enjoy.



This one was taken with my blackberry at Jamesport Greenhouses - they sell retail at Lewin Farm in Wading River.

These next two photographs were taken with the big camera - the head honcho! They are from a wholesale orchid greenhouse in Riverhead.

Catching up

side note: All the photographs I took in this blog entry were taken with my new blackberry. Friggin' awesome!

Its been a while since my last post and its mostly attributed to lack of time on my part. I have been working so much lately, except for this week because of this nasty cold I caught. No one else at work has it so I assume Rob brought it home with him. Lots of the guys he works with have kids and such and just the other day Rob was sneezing up a storm and a bit on the sniffly side. Fortunately for him, his cold only lasted a day or two. Mine lingered from Saturday until yesterday. Last night was the first night I hadn't used NYQUIL in 4 days. It was a rough road because i wasnt quite feeling awful enough to stay in bed all day long, but I knew if went into work I would be miserable. SO I just stayed home. Actually the secretary in my office ordered me to ... "Don't spread your germs around here"! I totally get it.

Today, despite the weather, I am feeling 90% better. Not quite 100% yet, but we're getting there. I'm really trying to focus on NOT bogging myself down with events and
plans every weekend these days. Keep It Simple Stupid....thats what they say right? And with 6 weeks to go before the wedding, I like the sound of that plan the best.

Rob and I are working on our gardens (both flower and vegetable) at home on the weekends, pending weather of course. Last weekend it was so sunny and beautiful on Saturday that I couldnt help but head to the garden center for some pansies. There actually wasnt that much of a supply. Not sure if I am late in the game or early. But i picked up a couple of flats of purple and yellow pansies, plant food, an extra bag of soil to add some nutrients to the soil, and some sunflower seeds. I spent the WHOLE day planting and cleaning and raking. And when Rob got home from work around 11am he felt energized and ready to start cleaning out the garage. Yippie! He did quite a bit too. We can actually walk to the back of the garage without stepping over anything! Of course, there was incentive. My grandfather bought us a lawn mower as a wedding gift. He was like a kid in a candy shop pushing that thing around the yard on Saturday afternoon.

On Sunday, when my cold had suddenly hit every inch of me, I recieved a call from my best friend Christy. "HELP! We need help putting together Luke's new swingset". You remember Luke. He's that cute little three year old that has Rob and I pretty much wrapped around his little pinky. So off we went armed with our most powerful tools - me with my tissues and honking nose and Rob with his hammer and screw gun. I was never very good with a hammer anyway...and even worse with a knife in the kitchen. (Another story for another time.)

When we arrived the swingset was mostly already put together - with the parts requiring more than 1 man and a 6 month pregnant lady still yet to be tackled. That being the roof and the slide. Rob LOVES this stuff... he and my friend Christy are fairly compatible in that they LOVE to work with their hands and building things is their specialty. Christy built their 6 foot high corner TV stand with a pull out DVD rack that sits in their living room. Dumbfounded by the sight all I had to say was... 'WOW! YOU made this?". Me? I'm good at handing people wrenches, hammers, screws and the directions when become baffled, which is pretty often! LOL!


By mid afternoon, Luke was sliding down the slide saying "this my swingset, tasha?".

"yup kiddo, it sure is!"

Christy sprayed the slide with some pledge to make it a little more slippery for him and on his next trip down, he landed square on his behind. Everyone laughed, including Luke. Then he was off without a moment's notice to climb the ladder for another run.

He was so elated by this massive new "toy" in his backyard. Gosh, it even brought a smile to my sickly, stuffed up face. I kept snapping pictures whenever i got the opportunity. This was an icon in his life. It brought me back to when i was his age and just as excited about my new swingset, which was bought by my grandfather to subdue the slow torture i was about to recieve when my brother came into our family. It worked, for the most part. Not that I don't love my brother. He's awesome! But well you know ...sibling rivalry is fierce! Besides that I have happy memories swinging away and sliding down my slide. It was summer time then and I would stick the hose on the slide to make it go extra fast.

Speaking of children..... stay tuned for the next blog!