you know how they say if you die in your dreams, you die in real life? I dont know if it's really true but i can say that something similar has happened to me (sans death).
I often have these recurring theme dreams where i am running from building to building or house to house looking for a bathroom. My bladder is almost always full and i'm pretty darn desperate to relieve myself. Sometimes i even find a stall where the door is intact, the seat isnt gross and the plumbing is actually working and when i go to try and relieve myself, it just WONT come out....
....except this one time.
I swear its only ever happened once where began to actually "go". Well, at least in my adult life. I was in my early 20s at the time and man was it embarrassing.
Well, today, i feel like im having a similar dream, but thank god, no bathroom necessary for this dream.
You see, I've always wanted to have a baby and so, this being part of my dream, I have endured a tough pregnancy and now coming to the end, i feel like it's just never going to happen. I seek the end of this chapter with eagerness and anxiously await to start the next. I'm in my bathroom nightmare again, no end in sight...no relief from this constant pressure and discomfort..
....and yet, ironically enough, I visit the bathroom 3-4 times a night these days! Go figure!
Maybe i really am dreaming? Maybe i'm not really pregnant and i'm just waiting to "wake up" only to discover my life is dismal and empty with no husband, no bulging belly, no overwhelming happiness in my heart. I fear the worst, that the climax of this dream will be me holding my child in my arms only to be woken by some strange noise in my lonely house and empty bed.
I know it sounds sad, but i'm hormonal and i cant really help it.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
endless dreams
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4 comments:
Enjoy your last days with your little one on the inside. You won't have time to go to the bathroom, soon enough! Or, at least, go in there ALONE.
I hate my dreams, they are always so vivid, strange, and dark. The one time in my life when I had pleasant, colorful dreams was when I was pregnant. I had dreams of gardens and flowers, vegetables and green grass. I think someone said it was the baby growing inside of me that gave me nature & growing dreams!
You are so close to having your dream come true! I was off with my prediction, I really thought you would had him at the beginning of the week.
And the hormones do not get any better once the baby is born. It takes quite a few months.
everything is going to be alright
it really, really will
I agree with Nan, everything will be fine.
Enjoy these last few days (or weeks). Your life is going to get even better very, very soon.
:-)
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